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  Pretty, Hip & Dead

  Madison Johns

  Copyright © 2014 by Madison Johns

  Pretty, Hip & Dead Madison Johns

  This e-book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This e-book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author

  Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Any similarity to persons living or dead (unless explicitly noted) is merely coincidental.

  Acknowledgement

  There are so many people who have helped and supported me throughout the years, many whom I connect with on a daily basis. I mostly would like to thank my readers who without you, I would never still be writing the Agnes Barton series. I have received so many kind emails from many of you and it never gets old.

  Dedication

  I dedicate this to my children, Andrea and Luke. This one is for you.

  Note from the author

  This is the first of my crossover series featuring Agnes Barton and Kimberly Steele from my romance novella, Pretty and Pregnant. I hope you’ll enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it. As Agnes and Eleanor make their way to Redwater, Michigan, you’ll be reacquainted with a few characters who had cameos in Trouble in Tawas. With characters such as Mrs. Barry, Mrs. Canary, and Mrs. Peacock you’ll find a new mix for the perfect mystery. If you haven’t read Pretty and Pregnant, I encourage you to do so to get more of a feel of who Kimberly Steele is, but it’s not required as this could very easily be read as a stand alone.

  Chapter One

  Happily ever after sounds good on paper, but it’s much harder to do with your brand new husband’s ex-girlfriend, Clare Barnett, looking on, thought Kimberly Steele as she stood on the lawn of the church. She drummed her pink fingertips against her expanded abdomen. She was six months pregnant with her late boyfriend’s baby, and here was perfect Clare, with her flaxen blond hair and china doll features, staring at Kimberly like it was Clare’s own wedding instead of the other way around. It’s no wonder Jeremy Preston, Kimberly’s new husband, had been drawn to Clare, and yet here he was now trussed to a woman heavy with child. Sure, he professed his love and devotion to Kimberly during their vows, but would it be enough to sustain him until after the baby was born? Kimberly certainly hoped so, but she didn’t see a real wedding night happening any time soon.

  The backyard of the St Matthew’s church had a gazebo set up with pink and blue streamers cascading downward. Long tables were filled with a buffet, all the food made by church members. In the center was an ice sculpture of a pregnant bride and slender groom.

  Jeremy strode up, brushing a stray lock of his dark hair from his rakishly handsome face. “What’s the matter?”

  “Nothing, why?”

  “Don’t worry about her, Kimberly. Clare only showed up to cause trouble. I’ll throw her out if you like.”

  Kimberly shook her head. “No, she’s the spokesmodel for the Pretty and Pink perfume line. Corrine Campbell already told me I’d be working alongside her at times.”

  “Yes, I suppose. But you’re the spokesmodel for the Pretty and Pregnant lotion line. I don’t see why you would ever be working alongside each other.”

  “Well, my handsome husband, Corrine is running both lines. That’s why. I only hope that Clive Baxter stays involved.”

  Jeremy’s eyes narrowed in annoyance. “Clive?”

  Kimberly gave Jeremy’s arm a squeeze. “Look who’s jealous now.”

  As if on cue, Clive joined them. He had changed clothes since the wedding ceremony. His muscular frame was squeezed into a blue suit with a bright red tie. As the wind blew his blond hair, a few sighs were heard from some of the female guests, or was that Mrs. Barry?

  Kimberly stifled a giggle, almost not hearing Clive say, “I hope you plan on keeping your maiden name, Kimberly. I believe it’s a stipulation of the contract you signed.”

  Jeremy eyed the man with irritation mirrored in his eyes. “I suppose she’ll have to, but I don’t need to remind you whose wife she is, do I?”

  Clive laughed. “Of course not, my man. She’s legally yours now, but I believe I would have been the better choice.” He winked.

  Kimberly smiled sweetly. “Thanks for that, Clive.”

  Clare cleared her throat. “You two make me sick. She’s enormous. What kind of man would want to marry a woman that looks like her?”

  “I happen to think Kimberly is beautiful,” Jeremy said.

  “It’s not like you’re the father of her baby. She probably doesn’t even know who is.”

  Gasps could be heard and an angry Mrs. Barry strode forward carrying a yapping Weenie. “Mind your business, young, lady before Kimberly’s miniature dachshund hound is set loose on you,” Mrs. Barry said. Weenie yapped for emphasis.

  Clare raised her purse at the dog and Kimberly yelled, “If you lay a hand on my dog, that will be the last of you.”

  “Yes,” Clive agreed. “He’s under contract, too, so you better get used to him. All three of you are doing a photo shoot tomorrow.”

  Kimberly gulped and Clare’s eye widened.

  “I hope you don’t expect me to pose alongside her,” Clare whined.

  “Play nice, Clare, or would you prefer me to find another spokesmodel? I’m sure Mrs. Barry would love the job.”

  Clare paled. “That’s a laugh. Mrs. Barry is older than—”

  “Watch yourself, young lady.” Mrs. Barry’s hands flew to her hips. “I’d make the perfect model, but I’m too old to entertain such foolish thoughts.”

  Kimberly smiled. It was too bad because at this point, she would much prefer posing with the senior Mrs. Barry than the catty Clare. Of course, Weenie would be there for protection tomorrow, so all might not be lost. She hated to admit that she’d love to derail Clare’s modeling career, but that was only a momentary thought. What she really wanted was to keep Clare far away from Jeremy.

  Clive pulled out a camera and said, “Say cheese, Mrs. Barry.”

  Mrs. Barry smiled with the now squirming Weenie in her arms. Once the picture was taken, she set Weenie down and the dog ran straight for Clare with teeth bared. Clare was so startled that she backed herself into Mrs. Peacock, who held her African Macaw. Talons were raised and tangled into Clare’s up-do and she shrieked, “Get this damn bird off me.”

  “Bitch,” said Birdie. “Bloody bitch!”

  Red, green, and blue feathers flew as Mrs. Peacock finally extracted the bird from Clare’s hair. “There, there,” Mrs. Peacock consoled Birdie. “You can’t be clawing up every annoying person you meet.”

  Clare held a hand to her head. “That damn bird almost killed me.”

  “You don’t look dead. If Birdie had wanted to hurt you, he’d have pecked your face to bits,” Mrs. Peacock insisted.

  Mrs. Canary stuck up for her sister. “You oughta watch out where you’re walking.”

  Clare swung her arms. “It wasn’t me, it was that damn dog.”

  Mrs. Peacock adjusted the blue frock she wore. “Such language. How do you expect to find a man talking like that?” Her eyes locked with Clare and she repeated, “Yes, such language.”

  “I can find a man just fine. Isn’t that right, Jeremy,” Clare purred. “You ought not to teach your blasted bird how to swear.”

  “It wasn’t me. He watches too much television, I’m afraid,” Mrs. Peacock said.

  Everyone wandered over to where the food was laid out and they formed a line behind Kimberly, who was famished. Kimberly piled her plate with pot
ato salad and baked beans, and baked chicken in enormous portions. When Jeremy raised a brow she asked, “What? I’m hungry.”

  “Me, too,” he said suggestively.

  “You better wait some months before I’ll be able to fulfill that type of request.”

  He gave Kimberly’s waist a slight squeeze. “You’re pregnant, not dead. And you’re my wife, now.”

  “I know, but I’m huge.”

  “And beautiful.”

  The line moved along and Kimberly and Jeremy sat at the head table, digging in. That was, until Clare sauntered over.

  “I hope we can be friends, Kimberly. I’d hate to be at odds if we’re to spend time together modeling.” Clare smiled sweetly. “Try not thinking too much about Jeremy and me making love. It will just drive you nuts.” Then she walked away.

  Kimberly wanted to choke her ... of all the uncalled for words to say to a couple on their wedding day. Kimberly didn’t need a reminder; she knew what Jeremy and Clare had shared. She just tried her best not to think about it too hard.

  Jeremy eyed Kimberly intently. “Don’t let her spoil our wedding. Clare and I are old news. We’re married now and no nasty words will change that.”

  Kimberly tried to smile, really she did, but she managed only a weak smile at best. It wasn’t going to be easy seeing Clare on a regular basis. Sure, Kimberly knew Jeremy loved her, but she also still had her doubts. Everything had moved so quickly that Kimberly realized how little she knew about her new husband. She knew he was a lawyer, but who was he really? They had not yet had the time for a heart-to-heart. What if Jeremy felt trapped into marrying her? If only he hadn’t lied about the marriage stipulation of the modeling contract. What if that was the only reason he had married her?

  Jeremy poked her in the ribs. “Stop it.”

  “Stop what?” Kimberly asked.

  “Stop worrying. You need to grow a thick skin when it comes to Clare. Don’t give her any ammunition. We had a history, but now I’m creating one with you and the baby.”

  “And if I weren’t pregnant?”

  “If you weren’t pregnant, you would be by now.”

  Kimberly’s eyes widened. “A little overconfident, aren’t you?”

  “I just know when I want something, I go after it.”

  “I worked with you for six months before I got pregnant, Mr. Overconfident. You didn’t want me then.”

  He smiled. “Sure I did. I just didn’t think it was the right time.”

  “Oh, but it was the right time after Clive offered me the modeling gig? I wonder if you were more worried that I’d end up with Clive if you didn’t up your game.”

  Jeremy drummed the table with his hands. “You worry too much, and you’re playing right into Clare’s hands.” He motioned across the lawn. “She knows she got to you and don’t think for a minute she’ll let up now.”

  Kimberly ungraciously got up and meandered her way toward her parents, Bethany and Hal Steele. “What am I going to do, Mother?” Kimberly cried. “I don’t know if I can put up with being around Clare anymore. Jeremy and Clare used to be lovers and she’s going to constantly remind me!”

  Bethany smoothed her mauve dress down. “Don’t worry. Jeremy loves you and no amount of sour grapes is going to change that.”

  Kimberly bit her fingernail. “I know, it’s just that—”

  Hal interrupted his daughter’s train of thought. “Stop that, young lady. I didn’t get all trussed up in this black tux just to see you get in an uproar about some woman who doesn’t even matter.”

  Kimberly knew they were both right and she had never seen her dad so dressed up. And to think he had forgone his Harley Davidson shirts for the wedding. Kimberly wasn’t raised like Jeremy. Her parent’s idea of a good time was a bike run. Sure, she had gone on a few trips with her dad, but she was hardly a die-hard biker. Kimberly would rather walk along the beach with Weenie. That was the only time she went out without her high heels.

  Jeremy’s mother, Frances Preston, approached and smiled happily as she said, “I’m so happy for Jeremy and you. I just know this marriage will last.”

  “How’s that?”

  “Because he loves you, dear. Jeremy has never gotten serious about a girl before.”

  “Would you have called him a serial dater?”

  Frances shook her head. “I’m confused. You are happy, aren’t you?”

  “Yes, but I guess Jeremy and I need to get to know each other better. I just realized I don’t know anything about him except that he’s a lawyer.”

  She smiled. “You have a lifetime to get acquainted. Perhaps your hormones are causing you to question what you know for sure.”

  Kimberly rubbed her stomach. “Maybe you’re right. I better get back to Jeremy before he—”

  “Sends a search party,” Jeremy chimed in stiffly. “You had me a little worried back there.”

  Tears threatened to fall. “I know. This is just so overwhelming for me. It’s a lot to take in.”

  “Let’s not rush into anything. If you like, you can sleep in the spare bedroom like we talked about before. It’s downstairs and that way you won’t have to worry about tripping down the stairs.”

  “I never said I wanted separate rooms, Jeremy.”

  He didn’t say a word as he walked away.

  “Oh, my! I should just learn to shut my mouth,” Kimberly cried.

  “Don’t worry, Kimberly. I’m sure he didn’t mean it the way it sounded. He knows this happened quick and he’s giving you time to cope, is all. Be patient with each other. I’m certain it will all work out,” Frances said.

  Kimberly nodded as she made her way back to her seat. Where was Jeremy?

  ***

  Jeremy Preston, have you lost your mind? Suggesting separate rooms! You idiot. It’s too late to unsay those words. With any luck, he could wiggle out of it later. Kimberly was really rattled by Clare. Damn that woman. He’d choke Clare if it weren’t against the law. She was trying her best to ruin their wedding day. Well, he wouldn’t allow her to.

  Jeremy cornered Clare by the punchbowl. “What’s wrong with you, Clare? This is my wedding,” he reminded her.

  “Don’t remind me. It should be our day, not her day. You proposed to me not long ago, remember?”

  “I only did that so you’d shut your mouth.”

  “Well, it doesn’t matter anymore. Clive gave me the modeling gig I wanted. Kimberly better buck up, though, or she’ll never last in this business. Just wait until the press hears of her late date wedding. They’ll be all over it. New spokesmodel marries in a hurry. I can just see the headlines now.”

  Jeremy grabbed Clare’s arm. “I won’t tolerate you hurting Kimberly in any way. She’s the woman I love. She’s the woman I married, not you. So you would do well to remember that.” He released Clare and strutted away.

  When he rejoined Kimberly at the table, he suggested, “Let’s bail. I’m sure you’re tired.”

  “But we didn’t even cut the wedding cake yet.”

  “Of course,” he muttered under his breath.

  They linked arms and strode over to the wedding cake. It was a frosted pink concoction with tiny pink bows attached. Joining hands, they cut the cake, each cramming a piece in the other’s mouth amid the cheers of the guests.

  Chapter Two

  Kimberly gripped the plate that contained a generous slice of her wedding cake, hoping that Jeremy wouldn’t be in the mood to fight. She would simply assert herself and insist he sleep with her tonight. She was his wife, after all.

  When they didn’t make the turn onto M-25, Kimberly frowned. “Where are we going?”

  “To a bed and breakfast a few miles away.”

  “What’s the point, now? You said you didn’t want to sleep with me.”

  He frowned. “I know what I said and I should have just shut my mouth. This is our wedding night,” he reminded Kimberly. “I’m sure you don’t want to spend it arguing.”

  Kimberly toyed with her
wedding gown absently. “No, but you’ll have to help me out of my wedding dress.”

  “Gladly, but we won’t make love unless you really want to.”

  Kimberly was taken aback. “I’m not even sure it’s possible. Maybe it would be best to wait until the baby is born.” She squeezed Jeremy’s leg. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t still sleep together.”

  Jeremy smiled. “I was hoping you’d say that.”

  He made the turn into the Cottage Inn, which was located inside a sprawling, southern style mansion. He rolled up the circle drive and cut the engine, then jumped out, opening the door for Kimberly and helped her out of the SUV.

  She teetered on her high heels for a moment before regaining her balance while Jeremy retrieved a suitcase. There was a red carpet draped down the center of the walkway and Kimberly felt like a princess, waltzing her way toward the door. A fresh-faced girl dressed in a black and white maid uniform with her hair piled into a high bun greeted them.

  “Welcome, honeymooners. We have everything in place, Mr. Preston.” She said it like Jeremy had been here before and that had Kimberly wondering. Did he bring Clare here? Stop it, Kimberly. You need to quit worrying about that woman. If only she could. The best thing she could do was focus on this special night with her brand new husband. She was the one he married, not Clare.

  They were led to an elevator that sailed them to the second floor.

  “Oh, my. It looks like you picked the perfect place for us, honey,” Kimberly gushed. “I can’t wait to see what’s next.”

  The maid ushered them into a room that took Kimberly’s breath away. In the center was a huge Victorian four-poster bed draped with white linen. The comforter was folded down nicely to reveal two plump feather down pillows and rose petals were strewn across the bed. Kimberly walked to the sheer cream curtains and gazed out the large window at the view of the pristine Lake Huron. It was still light enough to admire the sleek sailboats on the horizon. She breathed deeply, inhaling the fragrance of freshly cut roses. How did Jeremy have the time to make these arrangements without her knowing it? A tear threatened to spill from her eyes as her heart warmed toward her new husband.